


filling the void

by margosfairyeye (Skittery)



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Anal Sex, Anxiety Attacks, Cock Warming, Dirty Talk, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:40:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27128692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skittery/pseuds/margosfairyeye
Summary: Alex finds a way to help soothe Michael's anxious energy-- --Fill for Kinktober Day 17: cock warming
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 8
Kudos: 119





	filling the void

**Author's Note:**

> Fill for Kinktober Day 17: cock warming
> 
> \-- --   
> cw: mental health issues - This fic is Michael POV and Michael has something close to an anxiety attack that he would normally soothe destructively, and Alex helps instead.

Alex rolled off of Michael, pulling his soft cock out and sprawling across the bed. Michael whined, the loss of contact too much. Everything today was too much—it was noisy in his head, he’d had a shitty day and he’d come over and practically jumped Alex, pulling him into bed before they’d even had a chance to say ‘hello.’

It had been fast, and rough, and Michael’s brain had been miraculously quiet for the entire time—his focus on Alex’s weight on top of him, on the feel of Alex’s cock inside of him, on the way Alex moaned and panted and kissed Michael like they were both starved for the contact. 

And then it was over, and Alex was rolling away, and Michael felt  _ empty _ , and cold, and awful. 

“Could you go again?” Michael asked, even though he knew the answer, even though his own refractory period was far shorter than Alex’s and he wasn’t even ready to go again. But he  _ needed _ , and Alex always  _ knew _ what he needed, knew how to give it to him, how to make Michael feel like more than a shell, more than a waste. 

Alex glanced over at him incredulously, looking sleepy and happy. “In a bit,” Alex said sleepily. 

Michael huffed in frustration. “I need it now, though.” He sounded petulant and childish, and he hated it, but he needed Alex to understand. He couldn’t just go sit on the couch, or make dinner, or watch tv or whatever—he needed the buzz of sex, to drown everything else out, he needed to feel the way he did when Alex was there with him completely. “ _ Alex _ , come on.”

Alex frowned. “Michael, I can’t make my cock hard through willpower alone.” Michael huffed again, feeling itchy in a way he couldn’t scratch, not on his own, and wondered idly if he could somehow use his telekinesis to help make Alex’s cock hard quicker—with Alex’s permission, of course. “Hey.” Alex broke through Michael’s thoughts, hovering over him looking concerned. “It’s okay, I get it. If you need to be fucked, we can use a toy until I can do it?”

Michael shrugged. It wasn’t the same—the silicone didn’t feel like Alex, it wasn’t warm like he was, it didn’t carry the weight of Alex’s body curled around him. Even if Alex was controlling it, it wasn’t the same, and it wouldn’t be enough. Michael sighed. Maybe he should leave, find solace in liquor instead of trying to tease it out of Alex, instead of asking Alex for too much, for more that he could or should have to give. 

Decided, he started to roll out of the bed, trying to remember where he’d thrown any of his clothes. Alex stopped him before he got far, though, gripping his hand hard and pulling him back down towards the bed. 

“Where are you going?”

Michael hesitated. He wasn’t storming out, he wasn’t upset or anything, he just needed  _ something _ , and he didn’t want to be the needy thorn in Alex’s side. “Don’t worry, I’m leaving. You won’t have to hear me whine.”

Alex blinked at him, frowning. “You’re leaving? Michael, what the hell? I want you here, do—do you not want to stay?”

“I need…something. I know you can’t spend a whole night fucking me just because I need it, I’ll just go to the bar and—”

“Don’t finish that sentence,” Alex said firmly, sitting up and looking much, much more awake than he had a few minutes ago. “You’re not leaving.” He frowned, thinking, then said, “I have an idea. Come on.”

Michael was skeptical, but he followed Alex into the living room, leaving his clothes when Alex made no move to put any on. 

“Can you, uh, blinds?” Alex asked as they left the bedroom, and Michael shifted the blinds down on the windows with his mind, throwing the room into the darkness of privacy. Alex smiled and kissed him lightly before walking over to the couch and lying down across it on his side, his back against the back of the couch. He beckoned Michael over, patting the couch in front of him. “Lie down.”

Michael couldn’t imagine the change of venue was going to do anything for him, but he lay down obediently, aligning his body with Alex’s. He exhaled slowly, trying to relax. It was better than he thought it would be—so much of their skin in contact, Alex’s hand resting heavily on his hip—better than on the bed where they had room to leave space between them. 

“Okay, so,” Alex shifted behind him, lifting his hand off of Michael’s hip and rubbing it gently over his ass instead before spreading Michael open and sliding his finger over Michael’s hole. “I’m going to put my cock inside of you—because that helps, right?” Michael nodded, trying not to squirm under the sudden attention. “And you’re going to stay still, and relax, and just hold me until I’m hard again, and then I’ll fuck you. Will that be good?”

Michael nodded again. This wasn’t something they’d done before, but it sounded good—feeling Alex, focusing on him, being good, and getting rewarded—and Michael’s breath hitched as he thought about it. 

“Good,” Alex said softly, and Michael closed his eyes as he felt the soft press of Alex’s cock inside of him. Alex hissed through his teeth, his hand still gripping Michael’s ass tightly, and his harsh exhale was warm on the back of Michael’s neck.

Alex moved his hand to Michael’s hip again, holding on tightly, grounding him. Michael opened his eyes, taking a breath. It wasn’t the same as being actively fucked, not exactly, but he could still feel Alex’s cock inside him, could feel when Alex shifted slightly behind him, could match his breathing to Alex’s even breaths. He just had to stay still, to try to drown out the noise with focus, and then Alex would give him what he needed. 

“Good,” Alex said again, as Michael let the tension drain out of his body slightly, squeezing the hand on his hip. Then he leaned back, grabbing something out of Michael’s vision, and the tv hummed to life. 

Michael looked over his shoulder questioningly. 

“The longer you can hold me inside you, the better it’ll be when I actually fuck you,” Alex said simply. “This will just make the time pass more quickly.”

Michael swallowed, and tried to keep still. He was facing the tv but not actually watching it—it was just a blur of colors and sound, all swirling together, like the buzz of an insect in his ear—he couldn’t focus on it, but he didn’t need to. He could focus on Alex’s breath on his neck, soft kisses every so often against his skin; on the feel of Alex’s cock, still soft but twitching every so often; on Alex’s hand stroking soothingly over his hip, squeezing or stilling every time Michael accidentally shifted. 

Michael lay and focused and it was better than he’d expected, good enough that after a while, his body started responding to the situation, to the feel of Alex and the knowledge that he was lying naked behind Michael. Michael’s cock twitched, his breathing losing its rhythm. Alex’s hand stroking his hip was still soothing, still reassuring, but also increasingly arousing. Alex’s cock was soft inside of him, and he clenched around it, just a little, hardly able to help it. 

“Michael,” Alex said softly, his hand gripping Michael’s hip tightly while the other one wound its way into Michael’s hair, “be good.”

“Your cock is literally inside of me,” Michael whined softly. 

Alex huffed a laugh that Michael could feel resonate against his chest. He moved his hand around from Michael’s hip, pressing his palm against Michael’s chest so that Michael could feel every part of their bodies lining up. “Yeah, and you feel so good around me,” Alex said, caressing down Michael’s chest, his stomach, his thighs. Alex’s touch was soft, and not especially driving towards anything, but Michael still found himself getting hard from the attention. 

Michael felt heat in every touch, and it was increasingly hard to stay still, but he  _ did _ want to be good, he wanted Alex to enjoy this, too, to get something out of it. Alex ran his fingers very lightly over Michael’s cock, pressing kisses lightly against the back of Michael’s neck, and Michael shivered. He drew his hand back to Michael’s hip almost immediately. 

“You can touch yourself,” Alex said with his mouth still against Michael’s neck, “but don’t come, and stay still—don’t squeeze me, okay?”

“Yes.” Michael’s voice was strained, and his hand flew eagerly to his cock, wrapping his palm around it. The relief was immediate; with his hand running lightly over his cock, he felt less tense and antsy again. Alex’s weight against him, his cock inside of him, was back to being a comfort. Michael tried his best to stay still, to only move his hand, and the effort somehow made each movement of his hand feel more illicit, worth more. 

Alex hummed in approval, and tugged lightly on Michael’s hair, pulling his head back so Alex could rest his chin over Michael’s shoulder. “I want to watch,” Alex said, turning his head briefly to lick at Michael’s earlobe. Michael groaned. 

“What about the tv?” 

Alex hummed again, this time in clear amusement, although Michael could tell Alex was getting more into it by the way his breathing was getting more labored. “This is better than anything on tv, trust me.”

Michael took a breath and stroked himself more slowly, putting on a show for Alex while quieting the buzzing of his own arousal. He kept his body very still, muscles taut, while he stroked, playing with the head of his cock, rubbing his fingers through the precum and coating himself in it, listening to Alex groan in his ear. 

Alex’s fingers tightened in Michael’s hair, and Michael leaned back as much as he could against Alex, closing his eyes as Alex sucked on his neck. He could feel Alex’s cock getting hard, could feel his hips twitching behind him. It was different, because Alex was already inside him; he’d gotten used to holding Alex’s soft cock inside of him, and now it was like starting in the middle of getting fucked, like being filled without the anticipation that comes from the first thrust. It felt good, and Michael moaned loudly as Alex gripped his hip more tightly. 

“Do you feel what you’re doing to me?” Alex said, his voice low and hoarse. Michael moaned again in response. “I want to make this last as long as I can for you, you’ve been so good.” 

Michael felt euphoric— he was floating on Alex’s words, on the feeling of his cock and the heat of his body behind Michael, on the knowledge that Alex wanted him, wanted to make it good for him. Michael kept stroking himself, waiting for Alex to move, waiting for Alex to fuck him, trusting Alex to give him what he needed.

Alex took a deep breath and started to thrust shallowly into Michael, barely even moving, keeping his cock inside Michael as much as possible. Alex wrapped his arm around Michael again, pulling Michael back tightly against his chest, but leaving himself more room to thrust. He thrust harder then, keeping it slow, dragging his cock across Michael’s prostate. 

“You can move now,” Alex said, mouthing at Michael’s jaw, “show me how you want it.” 

Michael canted his hips back at Alex, meeting him halfway in his thrust, and both of them groaned. Michael’s hand was still on his cock, moving slowly. He could feel all of Alex’s muscles tense and release against him as he thrust into Michael, his cock rubbing Michael perfectly, his breath warm on Michael’s neck, his palm on Michael’s chest warm like a burn. It was overwhelming, so much movement after staying still so long, but good overwhelming, the kind that made Michael feel alive. 

Michael’s mind settled into the rhythm of their fucking—the slow pace and the fact that both of them had come earlier making it easier for this time to be torturously slow, building up and up with each thrust. It was relaxing even as it lit up every nerve in Michael’s body, and he felt like he could stay here, on this couch, with Alex’s cock inside of him, for the rest of the night and be happy. Maybe longer. 

Michael was so lost in the sensation of all of it that he was almost startled when Alex groaned loudly in his ear, whispering, “I can feel you’re close, Michael, cum for me.” Michael tensed immediately, cumming into his fist like a shot. Alex kissed Michael’s neck and kept up his slow rhythm, fucking Michael through the orgasm. 

It was better, this time—everything was warm, and soft-feeling, and Michael could only think about how much he loved Alex, how much he wanted to live in this feeling, how much better this was than drinking, than letting the noise in his brain rule him instead of allowing Alex to quiet it. 

Michael squeezed around Alex, and Alex moaned. “I’m going to cum if you keep doing that.”

Michael smiled lazily and squeezed again, reaching to pull Alex’s hand out of his hair so he could turn his head and kiss him. Michael linked his fingers through Alex’s, holding his hand awkwardly above their heads. “I know.”

Alex laughed, the sound turning into a moan as Michael thrust his ass back and squeezed Alex’s cock until Alex’s thrusts became less deliberate and coordinated. He could feel Alex’s muscles tense, could feel the way his breath caught and his hand tightened against Michael’s chest, his other hand squeezing Michael’s tightly. Michael thrust back hard and Alex shuddered as he came, pulling Michael into another kiss. 

“How do you feel?” Alex asked, panting. His cock was slipping out of Michael, slippery with cum. 

Michael considered. He did feel empty, after having Alex’s cock inside him for so long, but it wasn’t the same kind of wrong emptiness. He felt sated, and tired, and grateful. “Good,” he said softly, then grinned back at Alex, ”you can keep your cock in me whenever you want.”

Alex kissed his neck again, and this time it was all comfort. He reached down to grab the hand Michael still had loosely cupping his cock, wrapping their hands together and resting them on Michael’s chest. “Good to know,” Alex said, and Michael could hear the smile in his voice. 


End file.
